by Laurence Morin-Emond on November 20, 2013 - 12:10am

In that project, I choose to talk about the concussions in sports. In the last years, more and more professional sports are thinking about avoid the fights and the violence between the players. Clearly, they get diseases at long term because of that and we have to find solutions about that problem. As an athlete, it also scared me to be hurt and it’s not cool (for the player, the team, fans friend and family) to be stop by and injury like a concussion. That’s why I decided to make my Research Project on this subject.


A concussion is generally cause by a hit to the head  (by a ball, a check) or by a downfall (on the floor of on the ice per example). On the hit, it will cause different symptoms like headaches, heartaches (nausea, vomit), confusion, vertigo, memory problems, intolerance to high light, tiredness and being tetchy. At long term, studies are currently make to prove which kind of diseases a concussion can cause, per example, Alzheimer, a severe diseases of memory loss. Severe diseases can be cause of repetitive and cumulative concussion, which the athlete have chance to get if the steps of rehabilitation are not complete. There’s not just concussion referenced to brain injuries in sport; physic head injuries have also to be considered. Plus of a concussion, an athlete can be diagnostic of vertebrae fracture, face bones break… The head is venerable to a lot of injuries, because the brain easily hit the sides (bones) of the head and when some of them are hurt, it become dangerous. To avoid this kind of injuries, specialists developed protections like helmets and mouth guards. Also, rules of bodychecks have been generated by some sports leagues and for the security of the athlete, some pieces of equipments are obligated to wear.


In conclusion, even if I was already attentive about the subject of concussion, I learned a lot about it when it was time to read and search on the subject. The information constructed my knowledge about the rehabilitation after a concussion (steps), the risks of physic issue (head, neck) and the solutions to avoid concussion (new technologic equipments). I also learned about the diseases the athletes can be diagnosed because of the cumulative concussion, at long term. For sure, it helped me deepen subject and found precise information.


I really agree with your position! It is interesting how you will organize your paper because you will cover all the aspects of concussion in sports. They are so dangerous today, especially for people who play professional sports. Hockey players are always at risks of end up with a broken leg or arm. It is a touchy subject because most of the people watch sports at T.V or pay costly tickets for games to see fights and violence. However, I am not sure what your thesis statement is. I think you should include it in your introduction. For your body paragraph, it would be cool if you provide a case study, like a person who has been injured young and have a disease related to this injuries. It is also very important to recognize a concussion and you should develop more about it maybe. Your arguments are not so well defined I think, so maybe you can really separate your paragraph so readers will not be confuse. In the other hand, I like the fact that you will talk about solutions. According to me, you should allow a paragraph for solutions but I don’t know how your outline is built so… Despite the absent thesis statement, you are doing a great job.

My point of view come from the fact that I don’t know much about concussions and injuries in sport! I should say I am not really an athlete, I don’t play hard sports such as hockey or football but I have friends who play and I am extremely sensitive when they injured themselves badly because of fights or accidents. I am also a peaceful person, I don’t like violence so I would tempt to say that we should eliminate contacts in sports… I am not aware of all different impacts a minor injury can have in long-term and it is really cool that you have deepen the subject and find solutions too. It is important that athletes, particularly young persons, are aware of the risks and be careful and preventive to avoid a future disease. In the Centers for disease control and prevention’s website, I have read that a concussion can change the athlete’s behavior, which is a huge effect. Breaking a little bone in your head could change how you feel, think, and behave. In conclusion, I think your research paper will be useful to athletes or just people who play sports.

Website I cited:

In my personal opinion, i don't think that taking away fights from sports is the right decision. I know several people who only watch sports to watch some fighting. For example, in hockey fights, people don't usually get injured from those. Its usually from just being on the ice. No matter what sport you play, you can always get injured, and concussions are not the worst injury that can happen. Don't get me wrong, i agree that they are bad, however there are several other injuries that one can face, that happen to be a lot worse. I understand that in the long-term, it may cause some serious damage such as getting Alzheimer's disease, however that doesn't happen to everyone that gets a concussion.

In the heat of the moment, there are so many people that would love to be in a fight, however no one actually means to hurt another person. If this ever does happen, the person that caused the pain usually ends up feeling really bad because that was never their intention.

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