Masculinity through real eyes

by P_Boo on November 7, 2015 - 3:08pm

While focus on masculinity, this article shows how this man who wrote this article admits he’s part of the man box, he defines his manhood by morals and values and that’s what will make him into a real man, saying a real man cannot be defined into just what’s in the man box but by parental bonding at a young age and having a proper education.

I agree to what he’s trying to make everyone foresee. He might be onto something with the parental bonding, because when we’ve had that love, emotional, and care that we need a child we usually do what we’ve saw our parents do. And if our parents cared and showed their emotions and love to us and to each other, we normally would do the same. But as for when he mentioned education, I don’t think that’s correct. I don’t think having any education, from high school diploma to a college or university degree, will change how you are. As we know from the glass ceiling or the cooperate ladder, that your education doesn’t make you a smarter man. They’ll still follow the masculinity that we’re taught from youth. Either to follow the man box or those few who haven’t been shown, but then they’re made fun of and call all these names that they end up being part of the man box so they can reclaim their manhood. Just like the article, “Your Princess is in Another Castle: Misogyny, Entitlement, and Nerds.” “We [male) nerds grow up force-fed this script. Lusting after women “out of our league” was what we did. And those unattainable hot girls would always inevitably reject us because they didn’t understand our intellectual interest in science fiction and comic books and would instead date asshole jocks.” The similarity because the men can never win, either their nice and proper because of who they were brought up and they kept those amazing rare traits, or they weren’t correctly brought up ( no love, no care, no emotion) so they end up growing up day by day following the man box. But if they keep those rare traits their “gay” “weak” same with the article, “nerds grow up force-fed this script.” Again from youth they’re being taught to be part of those bad habits. They’re trying for women out their league. Who says there out their league? Society? And now the actual women her self. I thought you fell for someone by connection, but who they foresee themselves and manners and lifestyle. 



2nd article,


This article is precisely stating the fight for Trudeau’s proof of masculinity. Harper is hands down jealous of the young guy because he is handsome and has nice hair, since he repeatedly told us all about it and how he’d be no good to represent our country and he isn't masculine enough because he has nice hair and if he gets elected it’ll be because us women think he’s handsome and not because he has the brains and passion to help us all in the right direction. Oh wait, that’s right he’s showing emotions and that’s not masculine at all. 

The man box, the box were young boys and men must stand inside and swear by these behaviour and not anything more not anything less. These behaviours consist of being stoic,strong,must not show emotion,work out,intimidating,macho, in control,respected and violent. Violence is the number one thing young boys and men turn to first, it’s natural to them since they were brought up not knowing any different so its second nature to many and shows a great view of their masculinity. Here's some proof that men think violence is the answer to winning, As stated in the article “If we even just look at Harper’s case alone, we can see this. With Trudeau also running for prime minister, Harper felt threatened and responded by highlighting a conservative government standing that represents violence. His party tried to convince the population that they very much needed the laws that the conservative party was upholding in order to defend the country against terrorists and Harper was very supportive of investing in war, thus embodying a stereotypical masculine gender role to appear more credible.” One word, violence. 

Just like the Princess article, masculine is to regurgitate behaviours that are put into a box and if you don't your laughed at and left out to fend for yourself. In the article where he stats “the geek falls for the hot non geek girl and is pitching to high, dreaming of something he can never have”. Why is he geeky? Because he was never introduced to the man box? Did he only have a soft fully hearted mommy in his child hood growing up, with emotions and a brain to teach him right from wrong? Because that’s what it comes down to daddy shows the aggressive behaviour and mommy shows the emotions and love but to live up to daddy standards the young boys follow their daddy’s habits of the man box and thats how we get a world full of aggressive, self centered. controlling violent men.

Works cited: 

Arthur Chu.,May 5th 2014. 12:07 PM. “Your Princess is in Another Castle: Misogyny, Entitlement, and Nerds.”

Tough Guise 2.0., Jackson T. Katz., 1999


First of all, I am commenting here because I watched a Ted Talk in my Myth of Race and The Reality of Racism class with a similar topic, which I found very interesting. I personally agree with your point of view, and it is important to realize how high the expectations are in men. However, from another point of view, it could also be interesting to incorporate races or racial categories into this equation. For example, when looking at the 'man box', it is indeed true that most men feel as though they are trapped in a box full of responsibilities and restraints at a very young age. If this were to be looked at with race, people from minority groups may tend to feel much more trapped than people from a majority group. When children grow up, they tend to suffer much pressure from their surroundings, in order to ensure they remain safe and smart. Then there comes the issue of minority groups, who suffer much more pressure due to the stereotypes they may face due to their culture. For example, a black child may be much more restricted in performing certain behaviours because they are seen as dangerous or as robbers, while mexicans or latinos will be seen as being involved in drugs, These are stereotypes that are sadly seen in today's society, and as we have seen in class, children are not colourblind, and can quickly pick up on these racial issues, which I do not believe is something we would like our children to face later on in life. To conclude, although racial stereotypes may still exist, the 'man box' is seen differently for men depending of their race, and this is something that could be changed, since all men are the same despite where they come from.

To begin with, I decided to comment on your post because when I watched the TED talk about the man box in my class of Myth of Race and The Reality of Racism, I was surprised by how accurate these ''manful'' values were accurate to our society and I was interested in your post and your understanding of this problem. Men are literally told how to behave and if they do not follow the ''unwritten rules'' of the man box, they won't be successful, they won't be accepted, and so on. I like your comparison of the man box being a trap of responsibilities and contraints since that is obviously what it is. I actually find it rather funny, because that is something that has long been present in our society, and I only really took consciousness of it when I listened to that TED talk. It is also important to make a link with racism, as men are not the only ones trapped in a ''box'' or responsibilities and contraints. I feel like in our society, black people and white people are told how to behave accordingly to their races. The best example I can find is the music. White people have their music, and black people have their music. When you catch a black person listening to white music, it is just awkward, for literally no reason. Why wouldn't black man or woman be allowed to listen to white music? Same goes for white people. That was just one example out of so many that I could write, but in my opinion, it represents best how race can also be a ''race box''. I think that these are the kind of stereotypes that can easily be fixed through anti-racist education. For exemple, by actively questioning a young student about the differences between races and why stereotypes exist, the student can come by himself to the idea that these racist ideas and stereotypes are totally groundless and have no place in our society.

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